It was actually the 7 year old who got the ball rolling on my " lets start Monday theory". He had been at a sleepover for 2 nights (no i didn't give him away) at his cousins house. It was just me and the 2 year old having a girls go hard couple of nights. Go hard we did, there was watching Peppa Pig, napping, tickle fights and pretty much doing fruc all because the 2 years old idea of a perfect day is Peppa Pig and snacks. I was just something she could put up with, as long as I kept the snacks coming and Peppa Pig on tap. Life was quiet without the 7 year old, not because he is the loud one but because the 2 year old had no one to boss around and fight with.
The moment the 7 year old got home, he recalled a promise that I had made to him about a month ago. A promise that I had hoped he had forgotten. Unfortunately he hadn't, so he asked what time we were leaving to go to the Festival of the Wind. Living with a vegetarian husband, everyday is a festival of the wind for me. I wasn't that keen to drive for 45min to see some kites flying around on the beach (yeh I'm a shit mum) and spending money on carnival rides that the 2 year old will scream to go on but then have an epic melt down once on them, because they are "scary". I gave the 7 year old 3 choices
1 - When his father gets home we can attach a kite to his ass and have our own festival of the wind
2 - We can go to an amazing delicious dinner anywhere he likes
3 - We can go to the boring stupid festival of the wind that is seriously crap and would eventuate into the worst day of his life, but yeh we can go if he wants
Obviously with no persuading from me, he chose to go to dinner. The town where we live, has just had a new eatery complex open up at our local shopping centre and it has a gelato shop, a burger joint, a mexican joint and MAX BRENNER… Pre quitting sugar every time we went on a holiday I would hunt down a Max Brenner (i was kind of obsessed). I had been secretly admiring everyones Facebook posts of eating there, since it opened and thought that this may be my last chance… being a Sunday and all… I knew he would choose the new burger joint and dessert at Max Brenner… who wouldn't?? So I rang my brother and told him about having dinner and made sure I mentioned quite a few times that it was" my last hurrah" so no one would lose their sh*t when I started rubbing chocolate all over my body. My brother was in for it, because he was going to give up booze and takeaway for 12 weeks (i give him 12 hours or 12 days to be nice) and he too needs one last hurrah!
I told the 7 year old that we can look up the Max Brenner menu online and that was when he informed me, that he wanted to go to Sizzler….Sizzler wasn't the new Max Brenner or the new eatery… Sizzler? Sizzler was so 10 years ago, when you only had to pay $9.95 for a salad bar not $25.95 and still only eat $5 of actual food.
He wasn't going to budge.
I didn't go out in a blaze of glory like I hoped I would. I had a glass of raspberry soft drink and I ate a handful of jelly beans, some ice-cream and crushed biscuits from the dessert bar but it was no drowning my face in Max Brenner Chocolate. Pfft some last hurrah!
So my Monday came and I had:
Breaky - a vege pattie on toast with tomato, lettuce and cheese
Lunch - leftover vege pattie on a wrap
Snack - macadamia nuts and 3 nuggets left over from the kids lunch
Dinner - Butter chicken and rice but instead of chicken it had chickpeas (frozen leftovers)
Dessert - half an orange and half an apple
I played oztag that night for my exercise but managed to roll my ankle in a bloody hole on the field. So I'm not sure many calories were burned with me limping around in the background, but I did do something active I guess.
So here I am at day two of being "amazing" and this morning my breakfast was a piece of sour dough bread with butter and a tall glass of iced cocoa coffee (which is basically milk, a tablespoon of cocoa, a tablespoon of coffee, a handful of ice and some dextrose).
This drink basically seems to go straight through me (your welcome) so maybe it is a good way to start the day for those who use the bathroom after me.
Lunch was a homemade pasta in crushed tomato, onion and bacon with parmesan cheese. Didnt taste anything like how my brain hoped it would… but at least it wasn't fructose free sweets.
I wanted to weigh myself today and do my measurement because nothing keeps you motivated then putting your weight out there for all your friends, family and strangers to see, but no word of a lie, the scales batteries were low, so it wouldn't work (maybe that was my guardian angel saying "sh*ttt gurrl you don't even wanna know that number"..( yes my guardian angel is from the ghetto). So I did the next thing that one can do to lower their self esteem, I got out my snug pants. The pants that I could comfortably fit into 3 months ago… The pants that 3 months ago I could sit down in and they didn't dig into my guts… The pants that I put on today that were tight… Pants that I was strutting my stuff around in at the start of the year are now the pants I want to burn.
I feel like I am at a crossroads at the moment. Pretty much things could go either way. I know that I will never ever go back to eating a full blown sugar diet like I did a year ago, but I can see me making a little treat into a daily thing.
I don't want it to be that way and I have proved to myself that it doesn't have to be that way. I know I can do this. I also know that Ive been a lazy mofo of late, who intentionally or not, has let some little bad habits creep back in. The annoying part is, that it isn't just food wise but in all assets of my life.
I have lately become the person who is always on her phone looking at Facebook, instagram and guess who just got snap chat!! Not for the dic pics but because I love the fact I can send the most ugliest hideous photos of myself to people and half the time Im not even trying…" hey whats that filter you used to give yourself the double chin and lazy eye?? Thats just me in all my magnificence!
I feel like I'm constantly trying to capture the moment on film instead of living in the moment. Its a really hard habit to break. I complain that I have no time to do anything, yet I find the time to see what people I don't even care about are doing with their lives and then somehow feel the need to let it affect me… "Oh lordy look what he just posted on Facebook…he can't even stand his wife and yet he is sharing memes of how crazy in love they are, Husband you so need to see this!!!" Why the hell do I need to even give this a second thought??
I've decided to cut back my facebook stalking time because really thats all it is, glorified stalking that you can't go to jail for.
I have the kids by myself for the week that my husband is away at work and in that time my Facebook stalking is pretty limited, unless the kids are asleep or watching tv and Im not forcing myself to clean or cook. However when the husband is home its like there is a second pair of eyes to watch the kids and I seem to feel the need to relax by just staring at the screen of my phone or my computer. Relationship goals on point. My husband can be just as bad, although instead of stalking people, he is usually researching things that actually matter to the running of our lives. I'm out there stalking a friends ex (important stuff really ) and he is trying to find us a new cheap car to replace my current one. A car that has me banned from the cool mothers club (yes my hubcaps are missing, i hit them on the gutter, yes the paint is fading on the roof, i was hoping the bird sh*t would cover it, and yes it has dings and bumps but hey i've had it for 12 years and have spent barely any money on the upkeep because it is amazing). Apparently its time to move on my husband says and stop driving a car that looks like it should belong to 16 year old/homeless person and as I have said to my husband… lucky I'm not materialistic because I have no problem pulling up next to all the soccer mum cars any day of the week. However the husband who used to be a mechanic thinks its on the urge of a breakdown, so car research it is. Still the fact is, while we are all in the pool having fun and enjoying "family time" he is researching cars from the side with his feet hanging in the pool.
I have decided that the month of April (yes I know we are five days in) is going to be the month of new beginnings. I'm going to get my diet, my social media habit and my marriage back in order. I'm going to be kicking goals left right and centre. High fives all around.
So I need to go back to the basics
Food wise - simple salads and veggies with meats (or no meat when the hubby is home), snacks need to be simple and not sweet (damm i was enjoying my slice of cake for lunch)
Social media - 2 times a day to start with an no longer than 10min a session
Marriage - Date night.. once a week no rain cheques
Exercise - I have my 3 nights a week where I play team sport but I need to start running and riding my bike more.
Baby steps to success.
Tonight I am making this for dinner as our basil tree is out of control and the 7 year old has requested chicken.
Just been requested by the 2 year old to "come play now".