This all came about from me posting a link to my blog on a small family site, where someone asked for some advice about quitting sugar.
I felt really torn because on one hand it would be good to get this blog out there a little more. Slowly I am getting a lot more people visiting this site and it feels good to actually know that someone other than my mum (hi mum) is reading this and hopefully taking something from it.
I have always made it clear that this site draws no income. I have been approached to be affiliated with some products and sites, but as much as I would love a couple of extra dollars in my bank, I also don't want to be censored by what I can and can't write. I want to be able to say " that recipe was crap".
I was recently approached by a brand of dextrose, which is a staple in my cooking to link their products. I was honest and said that if it is really good then I will do it for free but unfortunately I don't see a difference in their product at $9 a bag and the one I buy from the local supermarket for $3 a bag.
I also don't want them to sue me when they realise that I destroy all their recipes with my sh*tty cooking skills and set their brand of dextrose on fire because I am really good at resting things near the elements on the stove top.
I was also torn because as much as I want to get the blog out there, I don't want to bring attention to myself.
Most people know that my name is "Jess" and I can deal with this because I am pretty sure there are a lot of people in the world with the name of Jess (none as amazing at breakdancing and breathtakingly beautiful and as modest as me though). I don't want it to be associated with my job and that is my biggest fear.
I just like being able to type anonymously and not feel as though I have to censor myself or worry that I may offend anyone enough that they hunt me down and punch me in the face.
I agreed that I would happily share my sugar free experience as long as they
A) Didn't use my full name
B) Use a photo of me that you can't see my face front on.
They agreed quite easily and quickly, DAM! I should have asked for my own trailer equipped with fructose free treats and vodka and soda water on ice. (next time)
I asked if they could send me through the questions first so I could reply before they called me up. I did this because anyone that knows me, knows I love a good chat. They also know that sometimes I say inappropriate things, that I think are hilarious but others think I may have something wrong with me. The interview went quite well, well I think it did, as I have never been interviewed before, so it could actually have been a massive failure. The journalist was a really sweet chick and made me feel quite at ease.
The photographer was on his way over and I wanted to stay away from a photo of me cooking (unless I could wear my Michelangelo's David apron ). So I decided to set up how I wanted the photo to be taken and got all my books I cook with and sprawled them on the table around my laptop.
I then realised that the table was still covered in last nights dinner crumbs and maybe crumbs from last weeks dinner, so I quickly grabbed a table cloth to throw over the table. Unfortunately because I am all class and never use a bloody tablecloth (whats the point my 2 animals/children who would have it covered in food in 2min flat) I grabbed one out of its packet which meant it had all creases all over it from being folded. I thought about ironing it, but that thought was interrupted by the photographer arriving…
I felt so so wrong pretending to be typing at my computer and he kept asking to move my head more and I kept saying "No I want to be like that dentist guy on the add where they say you aren't allowed to see his face"..
He didn't show me the pics before he left so for all I know, it may be a full blown selfie.
I did brush my hair all nice but after a mirror inspection after he left, I could see that my fringe had kinda stuck to my head in sweat and I had a nice little flick going off the bottom left hand side of my hair. So I'm pretty sure this photo will not be the one that gets me my cover of Vogue magazine….
I got a call a couple of hours later saying that they need to publish a photo with my face in it and sent me one they liked. It looked like me (funny that). I also looked very serious!! So I sent them the pic (the one down the bottom with half my face in it.) Unfortunately they have to run with the pic that has my face completely in it… I did make one request though, could they please crop out my hulk arm. I would like to blame the angle but I'm pretty sure my arm definition is at a 0 out of 10 at the moment. I am carrying some pretty nice arm flabbage.
My husband said that I am going to get smashed by people writing to the newspaper saying things like
"some of those recipes have fructose"
"quitting sugar is unhealthy"
"she isn't quitting sugar, as sugar is in everything"
"she eats fruit"
"that is one ugly human being."
I still don't know how I feel about this whole thing. Nervous is probably the best way to sum it up.
I will post the article when it is printed and share it with you guys. Could be good for a laugh, who knows??
In other news. Yesterday I managed to completely destroy a bunch of cupcakes and cakes because I thought I was that bloody good, that I could skim read the ingredients.
Apparently grape seed oil is not the same as olive oil.
They smelt and tasted absolutely revolting. I felt like I owed it to them to not give up on them and to try and resuscitate some life into them by icing them. I covered one in icing and had a bite. Horrible. So I had another bite. Still horrible… I was not giving up on this cupcake and after a third bite I felt like I was going to spew, so in the bin they all went. I thought of perhaps giving them a burial but then decided against it because no doubt they would rise in the middle of the night seeking revenge.
I was not going to let that excuse for a cake ruin my evening. In my Facebook newsfeed someone had commented on the best cake ever. The cake was called " magic custard cake"…. it had me at MAGIC.
All I needed to do was replace the caster sugar with dextrose.
After reading all the reviews about how it failed and how hard it was to get right, I considered not bothering after already having one epic fail for the day, but the word "MAGIC" was calling me.
To me it tasted like bread and butter pudding. I liked it but I don't know if I would call it magic. I think I would call it " Custard Cake with a hint of Magic"…
However both kids LOVED it! As in declared it to be the best cake ever and have asked me to make another one because it was devoured.
I enjoyed it more the next day cold and the kids were all over it both hot and cold. The husband said the texture was all types of wrong and was not a fan at all.
The recipe is here
I also whipped up a Ricotta Cheesecake for a bbq a couple of days ago and it was really dry. I'm not sure if I cooked it for too long or if thats how it was meant to be, but it needed a fructose free custard to make it really worth eating. I still ate a lot of it because what type of a person would let a cheesecake go to waste.
The recipe is here
Anyway I have to go take the 7 year old shopping for school supplies because I am "that mum" who leaves it to the last minute and the text books are always sold out, so he has to become "that kid" the teacher has to photocopy pages for until his book arrives.