Here I was thinking how good I am, how I don't even want sugar laden treats and then all of a sudden the "silly season" hits and I have oreo pudding balls, chocolates of every type, nutella cakes, malteser balls thrown in my face. What the hell is a girl to do when it seems the whole month of December is a free for all Sugar Fest.
The truth is, sugary treats aren't my main problem, its the bloody xmas cocktails and xmas party beverages. Its the feeling that mentally I am now on holidays and yes I do deserve a scotch and dry if I feel like one, because thats what one does when they are on holidays. For the record I have had 3 scotch and drys for the month of December.. BUT that was because the universe was supporting my decision by not posting the sugar content of 1 can anywhere for me to find… yes, thats the reason.
Last week I managed to survive my staff X-mas party by drinking vodka and soda water magaritas and sugar free cocktails. That was until it got to the end of the night and I may have been a teensy bit intoxicated and decided that it would be funny to eat another staff members box of chocolates. Chocolates that he received in a secret santa present. I also decided that taking photos of us eating his haul was hilarious and that it should be posted on Facebook…. In my defence, I only ate 1 of them. The next day when I was feeling quite good for someone who really should be in a coma, I started craving soft drink. Sugar Free of course, but lets swap the sugar for chemicals shall we. This month I have had more sugar free soft drink then I have had in 8 months… I blame Santa.
How is one meant to maintain willpower, when every single day someone on Facebook is posting some cool recipe for christmas baking. Just looking at them makes me want to try one and the only thing stopping me from making them, is effort and going grocery shopping to get ingredients. Only a crazy person goes shopping in December, when its not necessary.
The 7 year old has printed out 13 recipes that we should make this week. 13 recipes and only 3 of them we can actually make by substituting some ingredients out for fructose free swaps. Condensed milk doesn't have an equal swap partner and it seems to be in everything. The 7 year old has come to the conclusion that I am some type of Grinch out to destroy Christmas for the family. He even got so dramatic and said " remember last year when we loved each other and you made those yummy oreo biscuit ball things".. Apparently its due to me not loving him and not the fact one ball has the equivalent of 3 teaspoons of sugar.
Would it be hypocritical of my to still make all my sugar laden treats and gift them to friends and family like I have done in the past. Everyone always raves about my christmas baking, but this year I feel as though it would be like me giving them a gift that I didn't want for myself. "Hey heres some sugar laden biscuits that my family won't have for health reasons, but you guys enjoy that sugar and heres to your health for 2016….
This is also my first christmas with a Thermomix. A Thermomix that will cut my prep time in half because last year….. well you would never guess how I crushed the biscuits for my cherry ripe balls…caveman style with a bloody rolling pin… Yep I wrapped the biscuits in a tea towel and smashed the shit out of them. I'm pretty sure I still find crumbs around the kitchen to this very day. How am I mean to full fill my Thermomix cult status, if I don't make a bloody peppermint ball in it?? The Thermomix gods are going to be pissed off… Maybe the 7 year old and the Thermomix Gods need to get together and discuss how terrible I really am.
All this focus on Christmas and we forget that the nearly two year old will celebrate her birthday in 2 days. Poor little darling will have to get used to being forgotten about, being a December baby I guess.
Apparently the 7 year old has declared that birthdays are an amnesty day for all things sugar and has given me a list of things that the nearly 2 year old should have on her birthday
*ice cream cake
*kinder surprise egg
These are her favourite things in the world along with chicken nuggets and hot chips.
The 7 year old even went as far as saying we should order an ice-cream cake and then cover it with smarties in the shape of a 2 and put a kinder surprise egg in the middle of it. Sadly I love this idea!!!!! It truly would be the nearly 2 year olds idea of the best food item in the world.
The jury is still out on this one, because I am not even going to kid myself, that my harshest critic in the kitchen would even eat a crumb of a cake that wasn't sweet for her. This child lives off the sweetness of her fruit servings and turns her nose up at the majority of my baking. Going to the effort of baking or making anything will not be worth my time or effort…. but hey maybe I just need to try harder.
I will admit that I did price a Peppa Pig ice-cream cake from our local icrecreamy and it is looking like it might be a winner. You only get one birthday a year I guess… (and insert all the private messages from the haters telling me how horrible of a mum I am).. Hopefully they can beat the current record of 43 messages of disgust, from when I let the kids eat candy at Halloween…. Sorry, not sorry!!
So here I am on holidays and I have so many things to link and post and share BUT I am going to have to cut it short because it is 11am and the nearly 2 year old is still asleep… ON HER DAYCARE DAY!! THE DAY I GET MY ONE SHOT AT FREEDOM!!