On his site, I am able to access the forums daily to see what other people are asking and hoping that someone may have already asked one of the thousand questions I have in my brain. I am slowly able to start putting more pieces together to this never ending puzzle that is, quitting sugar. I introduced myself in the section where you are meant to do this (so I was no longer a sleezy stalker lurking around in the forum backgrounds!) I also stated that I was keeping myself accountable by creating this blog. Imagine my absolute shock to see David Gillespie himself (the man who inspired me to push myself forward on this journey) giving my blog a shout out!! You could not wipe the smile off my face if you tried. So to those who are now reading this, due to David pushing my anonymous blog onto his league of followers, HI! and THANKS! I hope this doesn't disappoint!
Today I had lunch with a beautiful friend and as she sat there with her large iced chocolate, crispy pork belly main and fried icecream balls for dessert, I had to laugh. 5 weeks ago this would have been me but I would have swapped out the crispy pork belly for a chicken parmy (i'm classy like that). But today I was there with my ice cold water, my avocado, chicken, cheese melt on sour dough bread and leftovers of it ,on my plate. No dessert because I didn't WANT dessert, not because "oh I can't i'm on this no sugar thing.." It was an actual, 'I don't feel like it and I'm pretty bloody full from that lunch' moment. I was pretty sure at one stage, my friend was preparing to skull drag me across the table, just to make sure it was actually me and not some alien wearing my skin.
For anyone who is starting this sugar journey, or thinking about starting this journey, trust me!!! Once you get over the detox period your whole life changes. I seriously feel like every time I say this to someone, they are expecting me to tell them that I am now living in a commune out in the desert with my cult........ Or that I am trying to sell them something. " Try Sugar free and your life will change and if you join me in the next 60 seconds, I will throw in a set of steak knives usually valued at 39.95..."
But its true. I wish I could make those that I love and even those that I want to fly kick to the back of the head, know how much better things can be. I have been on every diet that you can imagine. There was the soup diet which lasted 24 hours, which sent my room mate and I on a binge fest, consuming frozen bakery treats because we couldn't wait for them to thaw out (yeh we were that hungry). There was also the grape fruit diet that I lost no weight on, but i'm pretty sure I lost the skin inside my mouth and also my dignity. I spent the whole time on that diet starving and that lasted 2 days. Oh and what about the baby food diet... Jennifer Aniston supposedly did that one. Well Jennifer Anniston can kiss my a$$ because all that did was give me the runs. I have done Jenny Craig, Weight Watchers, Michelle Bridges, Atkins, Zone, and yes I have lost weight on ALL of them, but I paid for it by spending the whole time being hungry and obsessing over food. One night whilst doing Jenny Craig, my husband accidentally kicked me and woke me up. I was absolutely furious at him, as I was in the middle of the best dream ever, where I was eating donuts. I seriously wanted to punch him in the donut maker... obsessing over food.. yeh just quietly.
But this quitting sugar is something entirely different. I am not hungry. In the last 3 weeks I have not felt like I needed food. Sure I eat breakfast, lunch and dinner, but I don't spend my whole waking day obsessing over it. I have never in my whole life felt like this. Usually when you "give something up" or "diet" you pay for it by feeling hungry and craving what you are missing out on!! For the first time ever, I have not wanted something sweet. This is not normal for me. I literally need to have something sweet after anything savoury, that's how my brain works. My cousin stayed with me last year and I made up a platter for us to eat while we caught up. The platter consisted of chips, dips, cheeses, chocolate, lollies and more chocolate. Apparently this isn't normal but my cousin appreciated it none the less. 5 weeks sugar free and I no longer crave any of this. After living my whole life (well what I can remember of it) wanting, needed and obessing over the sweet stuff, I feel like I am cured and it is GLORIOUS!!
Don't get me wrong, yes it was bloody tough in the detox period. I had a headache that I decided not to medicate because I wanted to see how long it would last whilst detoxing. Now that I think back on this, I have no idea what I was trying to prove... was I expecting to receive a nobel peace prize for taking one for the team in the interest of science.. Who knows but panadol really would have helped.
I also went through that stage where if someone sat next to me with something sweet, I instantly plotted how they could meet with an unfortunate accident that allowed me to secure their sugary treats. I never followed through with these plans, which in hindsight is a good thing, because I don't think they cater for the sugar free in jail.
The hardest part about this whole journey so far is catering for the kids and making sure I am not setting myself up to be that parent that takes their kid to a birthday party and instead of going and playing, the kid spends the whole party stuffing their face with all the treats they usually don't have. There was also the chance this could be me and not the kids, muscling my way into the food table, throwing elbows into the kids faces to make sure they don't get to the good stuff before me. Stranger things have happened, trust me.
However, the 6 year old is embracing this new way of life and today at the shops I was not sure whether to be proud or horrified that I had created a mini label reading natzi. I asked him to get the cheese that I was pointing at and he stopped and turned it over and said " Are you sure this one is ok? " I said yes, thats the one we get every week, he then said "yep under 4 we are safe" (safe from what?? The sugar boogy man, that will jump out and kill us if we break the sugar rules). I also had to try and stop myself from laughing in his face when he tried to look for a label on the catfood biscuits and then he asked "Is the cat sugar free too?" Yes Meow Meow (that is the name of our cat) is eliminating Fructose from her diet, and yes that Whiskars brand will fullfill that requirement.
Today being Sunday I knew I had to get my bake on, to make sure the kids would have food to get them through the week and the 6 year old would be happy to eat his lunch and not be shunned by his peers for having to lick peanut butter off a stick cause his mum is into that crazy sugar free lifestyle..
The first thing I do every Sunday, is make sure his water sits in the same league as the poppa hierachy. I do this by purchasing some labels and writing random weird stuff on them and putting a nice sticker on the front (to fool the teachers into thinking I'm normal). He has been loving me doing this and he is definitely my offspring because the crazier the better. He loves it when I write a joke on there or a saying. His friends all think its pretty cool too.
I always pack fruit, cheese and crackers. I used to then insert museli bars, packets of chips, packets of biscuits and some weird looking fruit snack that was shaped like scooby doo. These days I let him choose a recipe that he would like me to try and whip up for his lunch boxes. Oh there has been some failures. Biscuits that have had as much taste as a rock, not to mention the cupcakes that were made with beetroot. These cupcakes nearly had my son missing out on play at school, as the teacher couldn't understand why he would put a perfectly good cupcake in the bin. If only the teacher would have tasted them for himself, I'm sure he would have given the 6 year old a personal escort to the bin and then lit the contents on fire to make sure that evil cupcuake would never resurface again.
Today we made David Gillespies recipe for Rice Malt Snaps. They were very sweet and I think I would lower the rice malt syrup content in future batches. The 6 year old loved them and declared them his "favourite biscuit ever"!! Hmm should I mess with "the favourite biscuit ever". Is that tempting rock tasting biscuit status?
I also made some custard, just using a family recipe off the top of my head. I substituted the sugar for Dextrose and I used my vanilla powder I bought today. I was expecting it to taste like drops of heaven since it cost me $30 for 60gms of it. It also gave the custard the look the 6 year old referred to as "burnt". His actual words were "do we have to eat burnt custard". After assuring him that it wasn't burnt and it wasn't dirt, we all gave it a try. It was a little too eggy for my liking and I did pour in my dextrose to taste (so basically I kept pouring till it had the sweetness I desired). It kinda had a bit of a powdery after taste. I will continue to tweak this recipe but you can find it my version of recipes if you want to check it out.
Finally I tried to make a biscotti kind of bread with the almonds and pumpkin kernals that needed to be used up straight away. I definitely left it in the oven for longer than I should have, but it still tasted delicious. (maybe a little crunchier than usual).
I was going to make a spinach and mushroom pie for lunch, but the 1 year old decided that she needed some love and attention and currently the Wiggles were not giving it to her. So I cleaned up the kitchen and played in the yard with my favourite 1 year old in the world. It was much more fulfilling than any pie ever could be. There's always tomorrow.
Here's to another week of learning and living sugar free.